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Sometimes I wonder if this really is a dream.
[2005-03-17] @ [12:01 a.m.]
Coming to this diary on mornings like these is like coming to an old friend. An old friend that listens and tells my deepest secrets to the entire world.
"Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right." - Henry Ford (1863-1947)
Every night when I have to work, I come home in a generally good mood feeling as if I got everything done right but it isn't until I go to bed that my insecurity decides to rear its ugly, little head. And it has a tendency to keep until one or two or maybe even more into the wee hours of the morning. It happened again which is nothing unusually seeing how it has happened everynight since I have worked. More than likely a bad habit which I feel shall never truly go away, even when I'm 25, living out on my own, holding a steady job, I'll still be kept up at night by small little voices asking me if I doubled checked something.
And that is what it is tonight. Small little voices in the back of my head asking if I did something correctly. Kinda of like the last entry simliar to what is going on. And the problem is, it is going to drive me nuts until I can convince myself that I can fix it. Which is way I plan to leave early tomorrow to go back to work and find whatever needs fixing (if anything at all) and then go to a new day at school and then go to work in the evening from 5-9.
Yet I'm trying not to draw attention to myself about this subject of my insecurity (even though it seems like it). I just feel better when I talk about it and feels like a resolution in my mind that I have made up my will to do something and therefore it I am going to follow through with it.
And therefore I have made my resolution on what I am going to do. But I can't exactly fall asleep yet. I'm going to work on a story that I started where the inspirations for the story can be found here at my writing website thing.
So until next time, don't stay up too late, heh?
So, quick thanks for the image from confusedvision, under the Creative Commons License 2.0. The inspiration came from Lacuna Coil, an awesome gothic metal band from Italy.
This place on the web is fueled by diaryland, firefox, psp 9, caffeine in any form, books, slavic literature, and random bursts of ideas. With the exception of the image
and lyrics, the design and code involved is mine. Graize.
