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Burnt out-- exams rant.
[2009-05-05] @ [12:42 p.m.]
music Lacuna Coil - Shallow Life
God, seeing my last Joyce paper and getting a C- on it puts me in the pits. Well, in a hole trying to claw myself out on muddy walls. I took my exam in that class this morning. I feel confident on the first half and on most of my essay except for when I came to Ulysses because I was barely functioning after two straight hours of essay writing. I need an 80 to pull out a B- in that class. It makes me nervous.
I took Greek last night, and even though I studied when I could yesterday, I have a bad feeling about it.
In fact, I don't think there is one class I feel confident about with exams, even though I am studying. I don't know. I still have two left and I feel like any confidence that I have about this should disappear. Maybe it is the fact I am graduating but I can't shake feeling burned out through every aspect of academic life. It's like I am actually apathetic and don't care.
I am tired. My writing is suffering when it comes to analyzing literature. Ideas and inspiration are not as original as they use to be. I am wondering if I will really be able to handle grad school. But this is probably a bunch of crap I am talking.
I am taking a step back this afternoon, relax and tackle things tonight during a double feature of mindless action movies. And working on study guides. I only have two more to go. And I don't suck at writing papers. I just need a long two month break.
At this point, the afternoon is mine to just take it easy. I am going to Smithfield later this afternoon and then I might study a bit more after a nice long break.
Ugh. I made it into grad school and I am not going to fail my exams. I just need faith. After all, I've made it this far. Why should I quit now?
Till then, cheers.
So, quick thanks for the image from confusedvision, under the Creative Commons License 2.0. The inspiration came from Lacuna Coil, an awesome gothic metal band from Italy.
This place on the web is fueled by diaryland, firefox, psp 9, caffeine in any form, books, slavic literature, and random bursts of ideas. With the exception of the image
and lyrics, the design and code involved is mine. Graize.
